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Here is a talk on knowing when someone is using you in a relationship. It can be very heart-breaking to know that you are being used, so it’s good to learn the signs before you get in way too deep.
What’s worse than knowing someone no longer loves you it’s realizing that they never loved you all the games the broken promises and lies they led you to believe as time goes on you’re not even mad at them anymore not when you’re disappointed with yourself for being naive enough to fall for all their tricks.
It might be shocking news to you but to them it’s nothing new, not when they knew what they were doing all along.
Are you tired of being let down?
Here are six signs your partner is using you
- You’re reluctant to say no to them – this is called manipulation which is also known as emotional blackmailing where you are always afraid to turn down their requests. Maybe it’s because you don’t want to let them down or they guilt trip you into doing favors for them.
Healthy relationships require both partners to respect one another including their boundaries but when your partner is constantly overstepping them it can make you feel uncomfortable and disrespected. As they tug on your heartstrings and pressure you to make decisions quickly according to their wishes, it puts you in a place where it’s hard to say no.
2. You’re not sure what the relationship is. Maybe the both of you are exclusively seeing each other but does your partner see you guys in a relationship if they’re running away from commitment and give excuses like let’s just see where this goes or titles complicate things anyway they aren’t likely to treat you like you are worth being loved cared and supported do you really want to be with someone like that anyway you deserve to be someone’s first choice not just a temporary convenience.
3. Their inconsistencies throw you off repeatedly. Users rarely ever stick to their word because they know you’ll keep coming back to them it’s a classic trick up their sleeve they see how much you are willing to tolerate their selfish behavior and when you finally break and say you’ve had enough they apologize tell you they’ll change and you like the good-hearted person you are you believe them.
4. They are different behind the scenes Dr. Susan Whitburn states that when someone
loves you they boost your self-esteem and sense of identity but when your partner is just using you they care more about their own needs being met when you go out in public they might act affectionate because you’re more of a trophy to them than a lover without an audience though behind the scenes you’ll start to get the impression that they never cared about you or perhaps it’s the exact opposite they’re only affectionate with you in private because they don’t want others to think there’s anything serious between you two.
5. They avoid the heavy conversations you can’t have love without letting your guard down if your partner refuses to be vulnerable with you it indicates that they’re keeping you at arm’s length although this isn’t always the case like trauma being one factor if you find your partner has no problem being open with others but doesn’t do the same with you it doesn’t give you the full opportunity to get close to them it’s not necessarily about what you’re doing wrong or whether you’re good enough if you’re putting your heart out but they shrug off the intimate conversations then are they really even there.
6. You’re doing the majority of the work balance is important for relationships to sustain but go from one extreme to the other and you’ll find yourself in a shipping sink there’s only so much you can do until you run empty-handed. Psychologist Patricia Pape states some guys are very slick they know how to groom women know how to manipulate them and no matter how bright she is she freezes and takes on all the shame the responsibility for what’s happening if your partner is all play and no compromise it’ll only break your heart more when you stick around long enough to tolerate their excuses what’s stopping you from finding a healthy partner think you might be in a toxic relationship check out our video here for the signs remember it doesn’t only have to be a romantic relationship perhaps it’s your employer or your friends that are using you so just watch out and be careful.
As found on Youtube