Are You a Jealous Lover? – How to Tell

Are You a Jealous Lover? – How to Tell

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So, are you a jealous lover? Is your relationship burdened with jealousy. Jealousy can happen to the best of us, and most likely will happen to you. It is a natural reaction to what we may perceive as a threat from someone else to our status in a relationship.

What do you do when that little, green eyed monster, as it’s so often called, jealousy bites you? It can happen to the best of couples, no matter what stage your relationship is in. Sometimes, it feels like there is no defense against this relationship destroying bug. 

How To Tell if You Are A Jealous Lover For Sure

Most people are not jealous by nature but jealousy is usually put into action by some event, situation or another person.

If you are constantly insecure about your relationship and very dependent on your lover for validation you are susceptible to being jealous. After jealousy creeps in we begin to spy on our lover, worrying about the situation and reviewing all sort of evidence, some real, some imagined. Suspicion is a strong emotion here. Being a jealous lover is not nice. It takes away the joy of the relationship.

If we decide there is a threat to our love, we can have a very wide range of responses like clinging dependency, violent rage at the competitor or the partner, self-criticism, and depression with suicidal thoughts. But is there any way to conquer this feeling and overcome jealousy?

Here are some ways you can handle jealousy and stop being a jealous lover

1. Isolate the cause of jealousy. You may think that jealousy is caused by your partner looking sexy or by a certain person at work. But that isn’t the real cause. That is just a symptom. Try to understand what the real cause is, so that you can then work on finding a solution. Are you insecure yourself? Is there a lack of trust in the relationship? Are there unresolved problems that need to be worked on?

2. Focus on eliminating one jealousy trigger. You also need to realise that jealousy can be overcome easily. So start out by focusing on an activity where you work through one of the main triggers for your jealousy and try to find the cause. Ask yourself if what you are jealous about is even true for sure.

3. Build up your self-esteem. Most of the jealousy situations are caused by the jealous lovers feeling that they are not good enough for their partners. They feel inadequate and they feel that their partner would leave them for someone else, if given half a chance. So one key thing to work on is to build up your self-esteem.

4. If jealousy is an ongoing problem, there may be a lack of sufficient trust in the relationship. Working on the trust that you and your partner share for each other will go a far way in resolving situations of jealousy.

Jealousy can be a debilitating emotional state in your relationship, but you can definitely find ways to resolve this problem.

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