Are You In Love, Or Are You In Hate?

Are You In Love, Or Are You In Hate?

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Being in love is one of the most exhilarating feelings that a human being can experience. That is when you are truly in love, because too many people get this being-in-love thing wrong. If you are truly in love, you cannot be truly jealous.

If you really want to experience what it is really like to be in love, you are probably better off forgetting or disregarding most of what you have heard about on this subject or at least discount everything. Most likely what most of us consider as being in love, well, it falls short of the mark. Yet the principle of really being in love is so simple to grasp.

Consider the following scenario. Your partner loves taking a warm bath every now and again. So do you. So you both decide that it is a great idea to take a warm bath together from time to time. The only problem is one of you consistently is motivated to pour cold water on that warm water and spoil the experience for you both. Yet even though this happens and the water is no longer warm, you think you are both in love, or in the warm water but you have to indulge in this destructive practice of pouring cold water on something that you both claim you enjoy.

The warm water represents the love you share, the cold water represents the “hate” you feel such as jealousy and maybe cannot control and is pouring into your relationship.

When I say, hate I am not talking about hating someone. That is the more obvious and probably the better known form of hate. A more insidious form and so more dangerous would be fear or insecurity or selfishness that breed jealousy and resentment – negative feelings that do you in all by yourself with the help of no one and only make a lie of  the belief you have of the love that you so believe you are in.

You see, if you are going to be in love, you have to realize and accept that love is this separate entity apart from your feelings. It manifests where there is trust, truthfulness, honesty, empathy, compassion and of course respect. But it cannot manifest in an environment where the opposite of these are present. And where these would first and foremost be present is in you and come out as something else such as jealousy.

You cannot pour cold water – fear, jealousy, selfishness, insecurity, dishonesty or whatever negative stuff you have inside, on your love, which in this case would be the warm water you both enjoy and expect it to stay warm and the joy to go on. Some people who swear they are in love, have no clue that what they are really into is something else, such as fearing that the other person will leave them, thinking that the other person may just be too good for them, or being so insecure that they would hold on to the relationship no matter what is going on. None of this can lead to the manifestation of love.

If you want to be in love, then recognize that it is not something that you create. It just is. But it is something that you can experience when you get real with someone, get honest, nurture trust, show and feel respect, empathy, compassion and you both wholeheartedly support those things that make experiencing love more manifest. Remember, you do not need another person to find or even experience love, but you certainly need someone to share it with. And it is this sharing which is like the icing on the top.

So are you in love?  Or are you in hate by being jealous?

It is time to experience real love.

Peta Jane Kayes

MBA - Human Resources Management, Author, mother, wife, my passion is relationships and healthy living.

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